Sunday, January 30, 2022

THE LIFE WE LEARNED WITH

  Movies used to  be the exception and not the rule but Pandemic has changed that for me. My DVD library is small by others standard but it takes up several book shelves. I also hooked up with Netflix and their shelf is endless; not very good but what they lack in quality they make up for in volume. Whenever I have exhausted the Netflix offering and come up empty I turn to my DVD’s. Last night I went back to my DVD’s, watched a 1984 film made when Robert Redford, Glenn Close and Robert Duvall were young, set in the 1930’s, revolving around baseball, as close to a perfect pairing as I can imagine. I’ve watched it several times, many times and it doesn’t get old. 
I’m not about to review the movie. If you haven’t seen it, go see it. But near the end Redford (the ball player) is trying to explain to Close, (his boyhood sweetheart) why he never came back to her. The best he could do was to tell her, “My life just didn’t turn out like I thought it would.” Her reply was the hook line for the movie. She told him, “I think we live two lives; the one we learn with and the one we live with after that.” In the movie, the good guys win, the bad guys crash and burn. The separated lovers reconnect. Redford meets his teenage son who he never knew existed and all the bittersweet turns to sweet. 
I think we live two lives; the one we learn with and the one we live with after that. When I hear great lines like that in movies I want to give a big thumbs up to the writers. This one captured nearly two hours of struggle and last chances, compressed into a single sentence. It spoke to me personally: some things need to be let go and other things need to be nurtured and kept safe but still, who has a crystal ball? All you can do is all you can do. You hope the learning was sufficient and the present is clear. The idea presumes that you know when you’ve bridged from the learning to the living. You pray for the power of hope and a shred of courage. There it is: if you can just muster some courage. I don’t think it comes with a handle. You can’t just grab hold and hang on. Courage isn’t easy, somebody has to move their feet. 
The life you learned with and the life you live with; one line made the difference between a good movie and a timeless life lesson. With Robert Redford and Glenn Close you knew it was going to end well. That’s what movies are for, to leave you feeling good. But tomorrow the sun will come up and I will have to improvise my own script and recruit a cast of characters. My movie has no guarantees and the ending, happy or sad, will be just a springboard into the next episode. 


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