When my birthday was more cake than candle, I took comfort in the fact that my hours and days were equal to the demands on my time. When that balance goes rogue and the weight of responsibility chokes off the moment like a cork in the bottle neck, all you can do is prioritize and push. Some things get done, some things don’t but you manage. Then there is another way, waking up with nothing to do but be thankful for another day. You do your morning ritual, text cute emojis to people you love and listen to music.
Leon Trotsky was a Russian, communist revolutionary. He was never a hero of mine; most of his quotes sound like lame excuses, lending credence to bad behavior like recalcitrant slurs that escaped Donald Trump’s mouth. But one quote wasn’t bad, “Old age is the most unexpected of all things that happen to a man.” The most unexpected, I wouldn’t go that far but you do notice it in ways that you didn’t anticipate. Still, I am bridging it better than expected. In my 50’s I was sure another decade was about all I could count on. After that would come decline and concession. At (80+) I hold hope another good decade could still be in the cards.
In his late 80’s my dad lamented to me, “I feel useless and I hate it.” He was very good at some things but like Trotsky, totally unprepared for old age. He was a good role model but the most important lessons I learned from my dad were, how not to grow old. His operating ‘normal’ was a very narrow, unforgiving path. When it went away, he had nowhere to put his feet. I figured, don’t be afraid to stray out of bounds, keep an open mind and wander a wide path. A glass half full, even a quarter full is cause to take courage.
Forgiveness is wonderful medicine , it heals both the victim and the offender and, if fairly spent, forgiving the self is a double dose of mercy. With the best fairness I can fashion, I do that. So in that state of grace, even by myself and nothing to do, I keep good company.
Tedium can be boring as hell and I can not overcome that. It’s like a bullet, maybe unbeatable but not unavoidable. Dodging the metaphorical bullet has evolved into a skill set. If I have a plan it is to stay in motion, keep moving, pay attention and treat people like I want to be treated. Material wealth facilitates privilege and a sense of control but without good health and rich relationships, it’s a hollow prize. For decades, psychology research has kept busy with happiness, what makes people happy. By itself it seems, selfish greed is not a good precursor. ‘Happy’ is not an Either/Or thing. It’s like the weather, with its seasons and hour to hour changes. My ‘Happy’ meter registers on the high side of ‘content’. I would nor refuse an upgrade but if not forthcoming, the life I have is good enough.
I noticed a link on YouTube yesterday, there was another mass shooting, this time in Colorado, 10 fatalities. It comes on the heels of 8 shot and killed last week in Atlanta, Georgia. I don’t watch the news. I get more than I need without shaking the tree. Such violence will set off a predictable response for more, better gun control. But that outcry will be countered by firearms zealots. We live in a gun culture, no less than Afghanistan or Somalia and it isn’t going to change soon. After every mass shooting, the gun lobby rallies ‘round the 2nd Amendment and the NRA, waiting for the noise to lose its sting and so far it always has, lost its sting. They believe the solution lies in more guns. Everyone should carry, then good guys with guns would shoot the bad guys with guns. Arrested development, stuck in the 1800’s, vigilante justice, Billy the kid and Doc Holiday; how did that pan out?
I am rolling with the punch, aware that I can’t change anything that falls outside my reach. I can vote but we’ve all seen how divided government serves only half of its electorate. Again, with a long view of history, what resonates with me doesn’t make the news. Not a doom’s day prophet, not at all, but stuff happens and we shouldn’t be surprised. An E.O. Wilson quote here is more appropriate than Trotsky’s. “The problem with Homo sapiens is that we have paleolithic emotions, medieval institutions and Godlike technology.” Too many people with competing, overlapping, incompatible cultures and weapons of mass destruction. More important, we’re all equipped with brains that are geared emotionally for a slow motion, culturally isolated, brute force reality. True around the world, it also typifies the U.S.A. Some countries do better than others and at our best, we would rank around the middle. If you are waiting for reason and good will to step up, good luck. That fragile possibility leaves the door open for hope; but that’s all it is. Today’s sit-down-think-about has arguably been a ‘navel-gazing’ reflection, maybe a little jaundiced but it comes with the territory. I could forgive myself but as both benefactor and beneficiary, it would seem redundant.
Leon Trotsky was a Russian, communist revolutionary. He was never a hero of mine; most of his quotes sound like lame excuses, lending credence to bad behavior like recalcitrant slurs that escaped Donald Trump’s mouth. But one quote wasn’t bad, “Old age is the most unexpected of all things that happen to a man.” The most unexpected, I wouldn’t go that far but you do notice it in ways that you didn’t anticipate. Still, I am bridging it better than expected. In my 50’s I was sure another decade was about all I could count on. After that would come decline and concession. At (80+) I hold hope another good decade could still be in the cards.
In his late 80’s my dad lamented to me, “I feel useless and I hate it.” He was very good at some things but like Trotsky, totally unprepared for old age. He was a good role model but the most important lessons I learned from my dad were, how not to grow old. His operating ‘normal’ was a very narrow, unforgiving path. When it went away, he had nowhere to put his feet. I figured, don’t be afraid to stray out of bounds, keep an open mind and wander a wide path. A glass half full, even a quarter full is cause to take courage.
Forgiveness is wonderful medicine , it heals both the victim and the offender and, if fairly spent, forgiving the self is a double dose of mercy. With the best fairness I can fashion, I do that. So in that state of grace, even by myself and nothing to do, I keep good company.
Tedium can be boring as hell and I can not overcome that. It’s like a bullet, maybe unbeatable but not unavoidable. Dodging the metaphorical bullet has evolved into a skill set. If I have a plan it is to stay in motion, keep moving, pay attention and treat people like I want to be treated. Material wealth facilitates privilege and a sense of control but without good health and rich relationships, it’s a hollow prize. For decades, psychology research has kept busy with happiness, what makes people happy. By itself it seems, selfish greed is not a good precursor. ‘Happy’ is not an Either/Or thing. It’s like the weather, with its seasons and hour to hour changes. My ‘Happy’ meter registers on the high side of ‘content’. I would nor refuse an upgrade but if not forthcoming, the life I have is good enough.
I noticed a link on YouTube yesterday, there was another mass shooting, this time in Colorado, 10 fatalities. It comes on the heels of 8 shot and killed last week in Atlanta, Georgia. I don’t watch the news. I get more than I need without shaking the tree. Such violence will set off a predictable response for more, better gun control. But that outcry will be countered by firearms zealots. We live in a gun culture, no less than Afghanistan or Somalia and it isn’t going to change soon. After every mass shooting, the gun lobby rallies ‘round the 2nd Amendment and the NRA, waiting for the noise to lose its sting and so far it always has, lost its sting. They believe the solution lies in more guns. Everyone should carry, then good guys with guns would shoot the bad guys with guns. Arrested development, stuck in the 1800’s, vigilante justice, Billy the kid and Doc Holiday; how did that pan out?
I am rolling with the punch, aware that I can’t change anything that falls outside my reach. I can vote but we’ve all seen how divided government serves only half of its electorate. Again, with a long view of history, what resonates with me doesn’t make the news. Not a doom’s day prophet, not at all, but stuff happens and we shouldn’t be surprised. An E.O. Wilson quote here is more appropriate than Trotsky’s. “The problem with Homo sapiens is that we have paleolithic emotions, medieval institutions and Godlike technology.” Too many people with competing, overlapping, incompatible cultures and weapons of mass destruction. More important, we’re all equipped with brains that are geared emotionally for a slow motion, culturally isolated, brute force reality. True around the world, it also typifies the U.S.A. Some countries do better than others and at our best, we would rank around the middle. If you are waiting for reason and good will to step up, good luck. That fragile possibility leaves the door open for hope; but that’s all it is. Today’s sit-down-think-about has arguably been a ‘navel-gazing’ reflection, maybe a little jaundiced but it comes with the territory. I could forgive myself but as both benefactor and beneficiary, it would seem redundant.
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